I am crying, a little, right now. Have
been for a couple of days. First, it was because I heard that a
beautiful soul was so sick she was in a coma, and now, because she
has transitioned. Heaven is lucky to have this woman.
In a world where more often than not,
affection is not genuine, hers was. Every time you saw this woman
she had a huge smile on her face and hugs to give. When she was at
school she waved and talked to everybody in the halls. She reached
out to me when I was still the “new kid” and unsure of how to
interact with people.
Instead of being sad, I am choosing to
live with her spirit in mind. When I first heard she had left her
body, I was hit with a massive amount of survivor guilt, as is my
habit. “Why did she die, and I didn't?” I let that do its thing
for a couple of minutes and then it didn't feel right anymore. She
would not want me to curse my life because she gave up hers. She
wouldn't. I felt like she was with me at that moment, just saying
that it was silly to feel that way and I should live the hell out
life and not worry about why I am so blessed.
I am sure God just needs her up there
for awhile to boost morale.
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