Up Late

Soooooooooooooooo...I took a nap at 6pm, and didn't wake up until 10:18, then 12:10...still up. In the past I would be freaking out worrying about getting back to sleep, driving myself crazy, and not sleeping thinking about everything I won't be able to do because my schedule got thrown off.

I used to have this crazy self-imposed idea about when I could do things, and when I could not. Like, anything outside of the house must happen between 8am and noon, if it didn't, it had to wait for the next day, or the next. Dishes are done either while making breakfast, or not until 4pm. Homework and all creative projects are for the hours of 4am-6am, and a walk must start no later than 6am....

Now, I am much cooler, although I sometimes need to remind myself of that fact. My body has been trained to instantly panic in time related situations, and I am still retraining it to just stop and view the situation objectively. Step back, and readjust.

I can stay up until the sun rises and go about my business, or I can go back to bed and wake up again at a later hour. It is my choice. I don't work today, today is a catch up around the house day, no schedule, relax...

Even now, I am tired, but not quite bed ready yet. Writing is helping to empty my head of random thoughts that may pop up unexpectedly and keep me awake. I feel that most days as soon as my eyes open my mind starts going with my to do list. Bam! Let's hit the ground running! This is very frustrating since I am taking a class on dreams right now and this thought seems to dissolve all memory of my dreams. I remember feelings and bits and pieces like: water,people, school, animals....it seems to always be these things. Again, I should just be cool and step back. I have accidentally programmed myself to erase my dreams as soon as I wake up! Ooopsy.

Perhaps, if I write out my to do list now, it will leave me alone later.

To Do Today (Goals):

Finish last week's online homework

Dole out items from Bean- Shoes, supplies

Make Up Yoga Class tonight

Do Laundry

See how many more hours of Community Service I need to do

Straighten house so cleaners don't have to deal with my clutter tomorrow

Take a walk, do yoga

Scan and mail docs for work

Not bad! Actually pretty light!

I feel much better! Woo-hoo! Writing things out so I can see them makes them less ominous than random thoughts ping-ponging around in my brain all at once, nice. :)